What are you working on?
I’m working – slowly, but fairly surely - on progressing. Though not quite enough time has passed by that any lack of presence is obvious, I have been pulling away from this space 'physically' lately, although mentally I detached myself quite some time ago. There has been something about ‘here’ – if I’m to be honest with you (and why wouldn't I be?) – that doesn't fit right with me. The feelings of unease arose originally from my worries about the design - and my lack of creative ability to makes changes - but has slowly moved towards the content I create, the need to take a next step, and the want to offer something a little 'more'.
Though I haven’t yet put my finger on why, discussions (and wonderful advice from Trina, Holly, and Tara) have lead me to realise that, for me to progress (and I have, thankfully, decided that is something I want to do), I need to find a purpose for this space. Questions about what I 'add' to the lives (or, rather, the experience) of those who visit here have danced centre-stage in my thoughts of late, and the problem has been that I'm not sure I'm able to answer that question, much as I’ve tried.
My aim, then (alongside creating content you already see here), is to branch out (to think outside this little box-head of mine), and to do my best to offer you all something new and exciting; the meaningful every day. I want to share more of me - not just images (like the above - hellooo!) - but also my thoughts and feelings. Opinions even (yes, I used the 'o' word!). After reading a fantastically-raw and honesty-filled email from Molly last night - the newsletter for Cora, the company Molly is the founder of, whose mission I wrote about back in June - and the words of Shannon (that I head over to read every. bloody. day - that's how marvellous she is), I have realised how important it is for me to not feel frightened to be open. We all have voices that deserve to be heard, and I'm going to work towards lifting whatever it is that I've felt stifled by for so long.
The new year will bring with it my last 6 months at university, and a massive step towards my future life, with a move to a new city (either Sheffield or Manchester) planned for late summer, to coincide with my boy starting his postgraduate degree (which is jolly weird to say when we've yet to graduate as undergrads!). My wish is that I will be proactive in my search for what my own future will hold, and so I will be holding myself accountable for the decisions I make in 2015 by documenting my journey here. I have a slightly different story to tell than those of your average undergrad, as a 29 year old who very much has disliked her university experience (gotta be honest, haven't I?!), with no real plans for where I'm going, or what I want to do. I'm hoping that, in recording each step of the way, I'll be more present in my experience, and benefit more greatly from it.
I’ve also been toying with the idea – and it’s something I discussed with Rosie and Amy via twitter, both of whom thought it sounded like a good un’ – of creating an online group to help others do the same; my idea is that (I can't take all the credit - that goes to this episode of Jess' podcast) those who become involved will set themselves goals for the month and in return will be assigned a partner who will help them achieve them, through encouragement and support. I haven’t thought out all the nitty gritty details yet, but I'm feeling jazzed about the idea - pop a comment below if it sounds like something you'd be interested in taking part in!
I’m also still working on a new design for this space. As I’ve mentioned, a lot of the problems I’ve had with posting here (especially new ideas I've had, i.e. those on introducing a series) is that I've been loathe to do so when it doesn't look as I want it to. Though I know my effort isn't ‘wasted’ as such, whilst I'm not happy with the way it looks I just can’t take the next steps I want to, content-wise. Because of this, I am determined to brush up on my (almost non-existent) html and css skills, and take a step towards creating my own designed-by-these-very-hands website. *Aside - any tips or tricks you fancy sharing would be most welcomed!*. It's been on my mind for a while but, ever-the-pessimist, I've told myself time and time again that I just can't do it. I'm hoping that I will prove that little voice inside my head wrong, and have something to show off at some point over the next few months!